change.

I'm taking a break from my studying to quickly post a blog since I haven't for two days. but no one misses me on my blog because no one reads it. I might as well shut it down.

lately, no, very recently I've experienced very deep and drastic changes. there are a few people who seemed as if we would be close friends at first sight. first month, hangout enough with them, I get along with them, and believed that we would be good friends forever. history seems to be repeating itself in my eyes. now, these friends are drifting farther and farther away. they seem to be ignoring me. their soft and friendly tone is just gone. it's as if I've been played, tricked, lied to. its as if they have decided that I'm not there to do what I'm intentionally doing. as if I'm a big joke and faking everything. to me, in their eyes, I am someone who is expendable, someone who considers them expendable. but that's wrong. every single person that I ever liked, as a friend or more than one, they will always have a place in my heart. friends are never to be forgotten, only to be cherished. this is bothering me, I can't study, I can't sleep. The thought of another friend leaving and just ignoring me isn't something that is easy to take. it was all of a sudden.

just like it was 2 years ago. my best friend whom I've known since I was 2 years old. we used to play with each other, talk to each other, even went to summer school and some hard times together. and then, in one swoop, he left me. gone off to be a druggie, a "BAMF" he stops talking to me altogther, even stopped waiting for me to go to school when he lived in the next apartment. its all seemed to change, and just drift away. its all something hard to bear.